Making Up Help

Everyone does it. Not everyone loves it. Whether you enjoy dating or find it stressful and horrible, you know that if you are ever going to find the one person who can stop your dating life forever, you have to do it. Gentlemen, you simply have to date girls if you are ever going to find the perfect one for you. So, here is some good advice for you.

Successful dating can be broken down into the five most important things about dating girls.They are:

Girls are not guys.  They do not think it is fun to make noises by placing their hands under their armpits and acting like a winged creature. Even if they are drunk, they don’t like this. Save this type of behavior for guy’s night.

Girls are not guys. They do not think it is cool to brag about your previous relationship conquests. They do not want to know about the ditzy blonde who had nothing to say but had the most amazing rack ever created. Nor do they think it is great to have their guy greeted by every woman in the place. Take your date to a different place just to be on the safe side and never, never, never mention your ex-girlfriend.

Girls are not guys.  They do not like to see you show up at their door in your ratty old jeans with a cheap five-buck pizza in hand. Trust me on this one.  Maybe later – way later, like after the kids become teenagers – it will be okay for this kind of thing to happen. But for now, please, guys: take a shower, put on something nice like khakis and a pullover shirt, and have flowers in hand instead of greasy fast food.

Girls are not guys.  They do not love it when their date pulls out buy-one-get-one-free coupons at the restaurant cash register. There is nothing wrong with a bargain, especially in these tough economic times, but use those freebies when you go out with your mom (who will love your thriftiness) or your best buddy (who wouldn’t notice or care how you paid). Don’t make your date think that she is not worth full price.

Girls are not guys. They do not find burping and farting contests hilariously interesting and entertaining. Who can come up with most-silent-but-most-deadly one without any prior warning is nothing to be proud of, according to the female half of the population. Neither is it way cool to be able to belch out the melody to “The Star-Spangled Banner.” Again, save it for football night with the frat brothers.

Remembering the five most important things to remember about dating girls will take you farther than anything else when it comes to having a great time on your dates. The five most important things to remember about dating girls will also allow you to get more than one date with the same lady. There are lots of people who will offer you lots of advice about dating, and even some who will simply say, “Be yourself.”

That is not terrible advice, but trust me, if being yourself includes any of the forbidden behavior in the five most important things to remember when dating girls list, don’t be yourself. Be better.  Remember these five most important things about dating girls and have a better dating life.

Be clear; just like life is a cycle, so is marriage, and while we all can have a lot of good days, we all have our fair share of not-so-good days too. Recently I had one of those ‘bad days’y, one of those ones where it felt like all the things around me were being sent to test me. As much as I try my best to be one of those people who doesn’t let their moods rule them, my usual store of patience had evaporated by the time I got home and I was totally immersed in the events that had been going on around me.

I’m told by others that I have a transparent personality. This means that I see and feel things quite keenly, and speak about it. I’m told by others that that’s a good thing. You always know where you stand with people like that, and if you love them or you disappoint them you are always made aware of it. However, one other character trait that I possess is that I set very high standards for myself and the way I conduct myself around others, always careful to show the appropriate amount of love and respect to those that are close to me. The downside is that I set the same high standards for those around me and am disappointed when they let me down. I was talking to a friend about it last night, looking for ways to find meaning from the hurt I was feeling at being let down by a loved one, and she told me the most poignant thing:

“You feel disappointment so keenly because you love people so much”

So is it the same when we feel disappointed or let down by our partners? Do we feel disappointment or hurt so keenly because we put our partners up on such a pedestal and expect them to always get it right? This was perhaps a little more complicated than I had first anticipated, and it made me wonder whether the fault was on them for not living up to our expectations or standards, or whether our standards were in fact what was at fault. Is it fair to expect the same level of respect and love that you offer so freely to those that you love?

I tell myself that I must lower my expectations of others and that I will do so in what they expect of me, but the reality is that I seem unable to do so I think the world of my friends. If I love someone I feel compelled to share this thought with them so that they might know that they are valued, and I constantly live in hope that the same feelings are felt in return.

But in taking a closer look, we realize that this is part of what love is about. Sharing our feelings of connection with others, and letting them know that what they do is valued. We feel a sense of togetherness when we are able to share our feelings with others. Love is also what keeps us coming back for more, keeps us trying to do things better, and helps us to keep trying even when we feel let down.

So how do we manage to let go the hurt?

Some would say that unconditional love is giving love without the expectation of reciprocation. But it doesn’t make it any easier. A key of loving those around you is knowing that they too share the same values as you, and that they will be there to help and support you when you most need it. Knowing that quitting isn’t an option, and that the benefit of hanging in there is going to deliver benefits to both of you is what keeps many people going. Telling your partner about your feelings and expectations is a hard thing to do, and exposes you to a certain amount of vulnerability. There is also the fear that your comments can be taken the wrong way, or that they can be used against you or interpreted as a criticism.

It’s not about criticism. It’s about helping your partner see why you feel the way you do. It’s about helping communicate a part of what makes you tick. It may not be perfect, and it feels scary, but that is one of the most valuable parts of this exercise. In talking to a partner about how you are feeling and what exactly leads you to feel these feelings is a key part of intimacy. It’s about getting to know each other better.

And realizing that loving someone is about loving them even when they let you down.

by Steve Carter

Like all people at some point, Steve & Louise had (http://www.relationship-reports.com) relationship challenges and like many, decided they needed to seek some help and advice. In an effort to find ways to fix their problems, they spent months researching the mountain of (http://www.relationship-reports.com) relationship advice products, identifying the good and the not-so-good.. Read their independent and unbiased reports – Facts, Product Info & Customer Feedback